Психологи рекомендуют фермерам и жителям США «выдохнуть» и переключиться на текущий момент

As I write this, farmers here in north central Montana are sidelined from harvest by rain. A few overnight showers turned into true rainfall by mid-morning, dashing hopes of being in the field for the next several days. Though Mother Nature gave them the “gift” of sleeping in this morning, I know that many are anxiously looking at their fields, wishing they were out there, with each lap getting that much closer to the finish line. At the same time, my best friend just wrapped up a major project for the next evolution of his life, and he half-jokingly said that even with his to-do list complete, he is feeling oddly stressed. After several tremendously busy months, I asked if his stress might come from feeling like he was "missing" or "forgetting" something. He agreed. If you find it weird to exhale (like I do), you may have lots of company. ADVERTISEMENT By “exhale,” I mean several things. One is to relax — but being told to "just relax" can be stressful, right? It’s kind of like telling ourselves “go to sleep” when we can’t. It isn’t helpful. Some great advice I’ve received is to do a mental reset. Instead of telling ourselves to “be relaxed,” change it to “be curious.” For example, go for a walk, and challenge yourself to find something that you haven’t noticed before. Take a few moments to look at the sky and discover colors other than blue, gray, and white. I just did that a few minutes ago and I found topaz, cobalt and oystershell. Doing simple adjustments like these can help relieve some pressure. In other words, instead of telling ourselves to “RELAX!” we can say, “BE CURIOUS!” That feels better already, doesn’t it?! When I use the term "exhale," I also mean letting go of the need to constantly grade ourselves. I’m not a mental health professional, but I believe many of us take almost anything — including a task list — and turn it into a performance test, judging ourselves harshly. Perhaps it was how we were raised, perhaps we’ve experienced traumatic loss, perhaps it’s due to surviving extreme situations and now our brains are wired to be constantly vigilant. This vigilance can make us feel that we have to anticipate everything and prevent everything and get everything right. And it gets pretty draining. Vigilance is not a flaw — it’s our mind’s attempt to protect ourselves from harm. There are real threats in our world, but preparedness is different from control. Along with those real threats, we can also teach ourselves that sometimes the calm we feel is not the calm before the storm. It’s just calm. We can develop our sense of calm by stopping a few times each day. Soften the jaw, lower the shoulders, and take a few slower, deeper inhales and exhales. Don’t try to feel calm, just stop bracing for a few moments. Additionally, find five minutes somewhere in the day and say, “Nothing needs to be solved in this moment.” Put down the phone, sit somewhere comfortable, and don’t make anything happen. Lastly, I use the term “exhale” as being present in the moment and not constantly scanning the horizon for the next task. So much of our time is spent planning for what comes next — the next task, the next deadline, the next problem to solve or person who needs something from us. Even during quiet moments, our minds may already be several steps ahead. Exhaling means giving ourselves permission to stop looking ahead for a moment and simply “be” where we are. One way to do this is to allow something to remain unfinished. Occasionally, leave a nonessential task for tomorrow. Rest doesn’t have to be earned by completing everything first. The next task will still be there. Being present doesn’t mean ignoring our responsibilities; it means remembering that life isn’t only what comes next. Life is also what is RIGHT NOW. And sometimes exhaling means admitting that we can use some help. We don’t have to figure everything out on our own. Farmers and ranchers help each other. Lean into friends and neighbors. Talk to those awesome professionals in your community — your clergy, pharmacists, medical providers, mental health professionals, the people who work in the county health departments and county extension agencies. Resources are also available online and by phone — the AgriStress HelpLine is available in many states at 833-897-2474. The 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline is also available 24/7. It’s worth repeating: life isn’t only what comes next. Life is also what is happening RIGHT NOW. And when everything inside us says we should be doing, solving, preparing, or worrying about something else, maybe that’s exactly when it’s time to exhale.