Эксперты предлагают новые методы воспитания: от лишения привилегий до тайм-аута

Parenting in Focus: More discipline ideas Published 1:30 am Monday, July 6, 2026 By Cynthia Martin for the Sequim Gazette Recently we had some general rules about discipline. This week, here are two additional approaches that may be helpful. Withholding privileges is one effective way to discipline. This means telling your child that if he does not cooperate, he will lose access to something he enjoys. You should never take away something your child truly needs — such as meals — or something that supports learning and growth, like a favorite book. The most effective consequences are those that relate directly to the behavior. For example, if your child argues with his brother, he may lose the privilege of having a friend over to play. If he watches television when he is not supposed to, then television can be taken away. When the consequence makes sense, children are more likely to understand and learn from it. For children younger than six or seven, withholding privileges works best when it happens right away. If your child misbehaves in the morning, telling him he can’t watch television that evening may be too far removed for him to connect the behavior with the consequence. Instead, remove a privilege he would normally have at that time — perhaps morning television or wearing a favorite shirt. Whatever you choose, be sure it is something you can realistically follow through on. Time-out is another discipline technique that works especially well when a specific rule has been broken. It is most effective for children between the ages of two and six, but it can be used throughout childhood. To make time-out effective, follow these steps: Set the rules ahead of time. Decide on two or three behaviors you are trying to change. Explain clearly that breaking these rules will result in a time-out. Be prepared to repeat this explanation often. Choose a time-out spot. Select a boring place with no distractions. A chair that swivels or a window to look out of is not ideal. The goal is to separate your child briefly so he can calm down. Bathrooms can be unsafe, and bedrooms are often too stimulating. Start the time-out. Give one warning unless the behavior is aggressive or unsafe. If it happens again, take your child to the time-out spot right away. Briefly state what he did wrong using just a few words and little emotion. If he refuses to go or stay, gently but firmly guide him there. Say calmly, without eye contact, “I am holding you here because you need to have a time-out.” Say this once — no discussion. Ignore protests, excuses, or outbursts. After a few experiences, most children learn that sitting quietly is easier than resisting. Set a time limit. Once your child is calm, start a timer. A general guideline is one minute per year of age, but even a short time-out can be effective. If your child begins fussing, restart the timer once he is quiet again. Return to normal activity. When time-out is over, help your child return to play. Do not lecture or demand apologies. He has completed the consequence. If the behavior needs discussion, save that conversation for later. Reassure him that he is loved. Every child is different. What works well for one child may not work for another. Try different techniques and find the approach that works best for your child — and for you.