Использование препаратов GLP-1 меняет не только фигуру, но и отношения партнеров

As GLP-1 use continues to rise in the US and the UK, people’s bodies are being reshaped – as are their relationships. “Relationships tend to develop a sense of equilibrium and predictability over time,” says Dr Lindsey Berisha, a licensed clinical psychologist who has worked with clients using GLP-1s for over 10 years. “When one partner undergoes a significant change, it can shift that equilibrium, and even positive change can create uncertainty for both partners.” Berisha says that her clients who use GLP-1s often report feeling relieved that they are no longer consumed with thoughts of food. These users often develop more self-compassion, she says, as they realize what they previously interpreted as a failure or lack of self-control was a legitimate biological drive and food preoccupation that made life harder for them. “This shift can often be more impactful than the weight loss itself,” she says. But these changes can elicit mixed reactions from partners, family and friends, says psychologist Dr Rachel Goldman, ranging “from being supportive to feeling insecure, left behind, or worried that the relationship itself is changing”. None of these reactions mean there is a problem with the medication or the relationship, Goldman emphasizes: “The goal is to recognize those shifts, communicate about them, and find new ways to connect rather than assuming the other person knows what you’re experiencing.” Below, 11 Guardian readers share how GLP-1 use has shaped their relationships. I can’t share my experience with my unsupportive husband My husband is unsupportive. He’s afraid of long-term, currently unknown side-effects and likens GLP-1s to Fen-phen. As a result, I don’t discuss my experience with him. This has been a life-changing drug so far, and I can’t share it with the person I’m closest with. I can’t share the wins, the way I’m amazed and thrilled with how I feel, and I certainly can’t share any concerns or worries. It’s contributed to a distance between us. I’ve struggled with obesity for my entire adult life, and my family and personal health history put me at very high risk of dying young due to complications from the disease. But my husband scoffs at characterising obesity as a chronic and recurring disease. Instead, he thinks people should just make better lifestyle choices and stop making excuses – which tells me a lot about how he views me, too. – Anonymous The biggest impact has been on my daughter I have been on Wegovy for six months and have lost over two stone (28lb; 13kg). The biggest impact has been on my 20-year-old daughter. I didn’t tell her I was on it and she found out when one of her friends went in the fridge and spotted it. I didn’t deliberately hide it in the fridge, but I also didn’t make it easy to find. We had discussed weight, identity and GLP-1s, but I was so ashamed of going on it that I didn’t want to tell anyone. Related: People’s bodies are changing in the age of Ozempic. How are we meant to talk about it? My daughter felt worried, angry and jealous. Food is a huge part of our family life – when everyone is home, we cook together and eat together. What kind of signal am I giving her and her brothers? So much of my insecurity about my weight and appearance is offloaded on to an injectable pen. My husband hasn’t really said much. He’s observing me. He also wants to lose weight, but maybe not enough to intervene in that way. I’m the family guinea pig. I feel conflicted but mostly positive. I am carrying less weight. My back doesn’t hurt like it did. I can put on socks and shoes without being sore. I am more flexible. Calmer. I feel better. I care more about what I wear. I feel confident. I eat more healthily and drink less alcohol. The conflict comes in feeling like I’m cheating, like I don’t have enough willpower or strength to lose weight independently. What I need to do is own it and say, “Fuck it, I feel so much better.” But it’s not that simple. – Anonymous It makes me feel greedy and slightly envious My partner takes GLP-1s. I’m glad he is losing weight and is happy in himself, though it’s hard when we go out for a meal and have something to share. It makes me feel greedy. I feel slightly envious too, which is illogical. I would like to lose weight and am doing so without GLP-1s as I have a history of eating disorders and was recently pregnant but sadly miscarried. Maybe my partner being healthier will help us conceive. I think GLP-1s are brilliant and can really help people. My partner has struggled [with weight loss] before and this seems to be working. I am concerned about people using it who don’t need it, though. It’s complicated. – Anonymous I’m sick of her talking about nothing else My best friend of 15 years has recently lost three stone (42lb; 19kg) after being on a GLP-1. I am pleased for her as she seems incredibly happy. Unfortunately, she regularly talks about food and weight now. She talks at length about how much weight she has lost, the old clothes she fits into, and how good everyone says she looks. I am pleased for her but sick of her talking about nothing else. I have struggled with weight and food. I don’t want to go on a GLP-1, but I am struggling even more being surrounded by people who are on it. I don’t like how [these drugs] seem to be shifting the narrative around weight so that fatness is suddenly massively unacceptable again. – Anonymous What’s it got to do with anything? The truth is that [using] GLP-1s hasn’t really affected my relationships at all. My partner knows about it but forgets all the time, because it’s not changed our lives together. My friends don’t know, but they don’t know about my iron supplements either – what’s that got to do with anything? For me, my main issue is binge eating, which is a very private and isolating habit. Nobody I love saw me tear through three takeaways a night – I’d hide that, which would create a distancing sense of shame. If anything, the medication means I can be more present and open with the people I care about. It’s funny that people talk about GLP-1s being the “easy” way to lose weight. Yes! Isn’t that the point? I got my first fillings at 23 and remember telling my dentist how amazing anaesthetic is. Yes, I could get a root canal without anaesthetic, or lose weight by white-knuckling hunger pangs and miserable restrictions. Or I could use the brilliant medical invention that makes reaching my health goal feel just fine. – Anonymous I have pretended I don’t care about being fat all my life I have been on a GLP-1 for nearly two years and have kept it largely secret. Weight stigma is real. At work, people respect me more – people I don’t know have more time for me, and I get more praise than before. It’s ridiculous and so fucking rude. Generally, my friends are really pleased for me. They have seen my weight fluctuate over the years. My concern is that I am still concealing my secret. I don’t want people to think I’ve cheated. I guess there is still fat shame somewhere. I have pretended I don’t care about being fat all my life. If I told people I was on this damn drug, they would know I was lying [about not caring]. I may tell them as time goes on. Some will have guessed. It’s the wild west out here, in social terms. My partner is really happy for me. She loves that I look fire so much these days, and that is partly because I can dress well. I think she has felt insecure at times because of my glow-up. But that is only one thing. It doesn’t change our combined life, our shared ambitions and understanding. – Anonymous I love myself for the first time in a long time As soon as I lost 5 stone (70lb; 32kg), my husband told me he’s no longer in love with me. It totally floored me. I knew that I had become the woman I wanted to be, but I was no longer the woman who needed his validation. Related: Millions of people are losing weight using GLP-1s. How do the drugs affect their love lives? After a lot of heartache, I decided to stay and fix whatever broke between us. We have been together for 32 years, married for 25; we have three children and a beautiful home. We are trying to be the best for each other and have started dating again. There is still no intimacy, but the love and respect are there. I love myself for the first time in such a long, long time. I only want the best for me. – Anonymous I feel like I’m being dishonest I have been using a GLP-1 for two years and have lost nearly ⅓ of my former body weight. Almost nobody in my life knows. I have family members and close friends who have used them and have been open about it. I really admire their ability to be so honest with everyone. I feel like I am being dishonest with people even though I don’t ever deny using them – I just don’t offer the information. I’ve started a new relationship and my partner doesn’t know. I like to think he would be with me regardless of my weight. I think the main difference in myself that led to the relationship is my confidence and my willingness to put myself out there. Maybe one day I will tell him, but not yet. – Anonymous Now I’m divorced My ex-wife started using them to lose weight a few years ago. After about a year, she had lost 70lb (31.8kg). I was super proud and excited for her. But then she left me for another guy and now I’m divorced. – Anonymous She was chubby but happy The drug not only destroyed any appetite that my wife had, but it destroyed any desire she had for anything other than sitting around watching TV. My wife used to be a little chubby, but she was happy and we had a good life. Now she says she is “skinny, ugly and hates [herself]”. – Anonymous If he hadn’t been supportive, it would have been much harder I’ve lost 35kg (77.2 lb) on Mounjaro, which I started in December 2024. I’ve maintained my weight loss on a micro-dose for almost a year. I feel calmer, more confident, and much more inclined to initiate sex. I’ve lost my appetite for greasy, heavy foods, and probably still eat under half of what I used to. This was hard on my foodie partner, but he knew how important it was for me to achieve a healthy weight. I started exercising daily, and now my husband has joined me. Now, instead of drinking wine and eating cheese together, we go to the pool or the hot springs, and on evenings and weekends we walk. If he hadn’t been supportive and willing to join me on my health journey, it would’ve been much harder. – Sara, 42, Brunswick, UK