Новое поколение мужчин переосмысливает термин «мамин сын» как символ любви и эмоционального интеллекта

The Influence of peer groups and mass media Peer groups and mass media have played a significant role in shaping negative perceptions of mother-son relationships. These agents of socialisation often fail to highlight the positive aspects of close relationships between mothers and sons. Instead, they promote the idea that young men must separate themselves emotionally from their families to prove their masculinity. As young men grow older, they often begin seeking advice from their peers about relationships, careers and personal challenges. While peer support can be valuable, it can also reinforce harmful stereotypes. If a young man’s peers view a close relationship with his mother as embarrassing or childish, he may change his behaviour to avoid judgement. Their behaviours depend on what their peers approve and disapprove of.  Mass media is another powerful agent that influences how men understand masculinity. Popular culture has often portrayed men who are emotionally attached to their mothers as weak or incapable of becoming independent adults. Films and television shows reinforce the stereotype that a man’s closeness to his mother is something to be ashamed of. The more these representations are consumed, the more they shape social beliefs about what it means to be a “real man.”  The perception of being a “ mama’s boy ” is also connected to social status. When an unemployed man lives with his mother, society may view it as a result of economic struggles. However, when an employed man chooses to live with his mother or maintain a close relationship with her, society often questions his masculinity and independence. This social pressure explains why some men change their behaviour towards their mothers after gaining employment or achieving financial success. Society created single stories about the phrase "Mama's Boy”. These single stories are dangerous because they create stereotypes while ignoring the positive realities of mother-son relationships. The Dangers of single stories Some men have emotionally and financially distanced themselves from their mothers because they fear being labelled as a “ mama’s boy.” These single stories have created the false belief that masculinity can only be achieved through emotional distance and rejection of maternal support. As a result, some men develop unhealthy relationships with their mothers, replacing secure emotional attachments with distant relationships. Unfortunately, some only recognise the importance of their mothers after they have passed away, when regret replaces the opportunity to express love and appreciation. The belief that closeness to one’s mother weakens masculinity reinforces harmful patriarchal ideas. It sends the message that men must reject vulnerability and emotional connection to prove their masculinity. This also disrespects the sacrifices of many hardworking mothers, especially single mothers who raised their sons through difficult circumstances. Some men even perform emotional toughness to prove their independence. In extreme cases, social media has shown disturbing videos of men disrespecting and physically harming their mothers because they felt disrespected by them. These actions demonstrate the dangers of single stories that teach men to associate masculinity with dominance rather than respect and compassion. The mother-son relationship should not be reduced to one negative stereotype. As Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie explains in “ The Danger of a Single Story,” single stories become harmful when one story becomes the only story. When society only focuses on the negative meaning of being a “ mama’s boy,” it ignores the many positive realities behind these relationships. The positive realities of being a “Mama’s Boy” It is time to embrace a new understanding of the term “ mama’s boy.” However, the new generation of men seems to be rejecting the toxic masculinity inherent in the phrase and radically reinventing it.  A new generation of men should challenge and reject traditional ideas of masculinity by rejecting the belief that emotional closeness represents weakness. Instead, we must redefine the phrase as a symbol of love and appreciation. “There is nothing more powerful than being a “ Mama’s boy ” “It is okay to be a “ mama’s boy”; there is nothing wrong with it” This phrase comes from several American athletes who have a close relationship with their mothers; they are proud to be “mama’s boys” Successful American men, including professional athletes, entrepreneurs and public figures, proudly acknowledge their close relationships with their mothers. They recognise that their mothers played an important role in shaping their values, discipline, and character. There is nothing wrong with being “ mama’s boy ”. Instead, being a “ mama’s boy ” can represent qualities that society should encourage: empathy, emotional intelligence, respect for women, and the ability to appreciate the sacrifices of others.  Research has also suggested that strong and healthy relationships between boys and their mothers can contribute to emotional well-being, empathy, and healthier relationships with others. The phrase must be redefined to describe men who admire, respect and appreciate their mothers and women rather than men who lack independence. A man can be ambitious, successful, responsible and still proudly maintain a loving relationship with his mother. Karabo Mokgothu is a sociology graduate and emerging scholar from Kuruman, Northern Cape.